Tuesday, March 15, 2011


You know how celebrity deaths always come in bunches of three? Well, it's too early to tell yet, but judging by the following three videos, maybe we're gonna have to come up with a similar law for iPhone apps. 

See, in this first video, we have a demonstration of the iSnort "cocaine simulation" app, which delivers all the ritual - and none of the psychoactive fun - of chopping up and snorting fluffy white lines of Bolivian Marching Powder...

A-and HERE we have "the competition", a rather shoddy knock-off called the Nose Candy Cocaine App. The virtual straw is particularly crap.

And, finally, rounding out our Hat Trick Trifecta of Complete and Utter Uselessness, here is the nSnort, which is nothing more than a complete hack-tastic rip-off of the iSnort, which at least had originality going for it.

As for yer old pal Jerky, I think I'll hold out for the iSmack heroin injection simulation app. I mean, if you're going to fake indulge, you might as well fake indulge BIG TIME, right? Right.


  1. Oh just looking at that, well the first one anyway, and thinking about it, I want a snort! Ah, that little screech on the mirror, the lines, the lovely looooong burning snort...Ohhhh yeah. And I haven't done any since December 18th, 1987! Is it bad, or good, that I remember the date? Inquiring minds want to know!

  2. I'd say remembering the date is neither good nor bad, Anna. It just is what it is. I mean, hell, there's a reason why it's one of the most addictive substances known to man!

  3. We Need a China White Shoot a Balloon App. Complete with a Soda cap Cooker , Fresh Water Stored in an Asprin bottle. And a fresh U-100. Mojo filters and a unreliable Bic lighter._daddybear