Q: What's the worst part about having sex with farm animals?
A: When you see them a week later, they act like they don't even know you!
Our second Joke of the Day comes from BrummBaer of Dirtspawn infamy!
An elderly man in North Carolina had owned a large farm for several years. He had a large pond in the back, fixed up really nice, along with some picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees. The pond was properly shaped and fixed up for swimming when it was built. One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond and look it over. He grabbed a bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard shouting and laughing. When he came closer, he saw that it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond!
The old man made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end to shield themselves.
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
The old man frowned and replied, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond." Holding the bucket up, he said: "I'm here to feed the alligators!"
Never underestimate your elders' ability to think fast!
And, finally, what Daily Dirt Joke List would be complete without a WORST Joke of the Day? Today's runt-of-the-litter comes from our old pal Oze Parrot, also of Dirtspawn infamy! I think you'll all agree that it's a fitting inaugural choice for this particular honor.
Finding a woman sobbing that she had locked her keys in her car, a passing soldier assures her that he can help.
She looks on amazed as he removes his trousers, rolls them into a tight ball and rubs them against the car door.
Magically it opens.
"That's so clever," the woman gasps. "How did you do it?"
"Easy," replies the man. "These are my khakis!"