Wednesday, March 16, 2011


Hey, gang! Yer old pal Jerky's pleased as punch to be posting and getting feedback on a somewhat regular basis again. I do, however, have to confess that, since the original Daily Dirt went dark a few years ago, I have pretty much turned away from the political, parapolitical and world historical spheres in order to concentrate on creative writing projects and... well... um... going through a massive depression, among other things.

A lot has happened to me since November of '06, and I'm sure the same is true of all of you. I won't go into everything that's happened to me because I don't want to whine and you've all got your own shit to deal with. However, I do want to tell you that the fact that so many of you kept in touch with me during the 4-and-a-half years that have elapsed since my final blog has meant the world to me. It's probably part of the reason why I still draw breath, to be honest. So I just wanted to say thanks. I can't name names because there are too many of you, frankly, and most of you already know who you are. Suffice it to say, if you think I mean you, I probably do.

Also, I wanted to warn y'all that it might take some time before I'm back up to my fighting weight, cerebrally speaking, regarding the most urgent issues and developments of our time. You may have been wondering why I haven't written anything about the cascading Apocalypse taking place in Japan, or the collapse of long-standing Mideast regimes, or the American economy's ongoing slide down Razorblade Mountain, or, um... the latest American Idol or some shit. Well, fact is, I don't have anything worth saying about those topics yet.

Rest assured, yer old pal Jerky has begun re-educating himself in matters of global and universal import, and will once again be producing the kind of long-form essays you cats always seemed to dig so much, back in the day. In the meantime, I will continue to post humorous bits, links and quotes, jokes, advice columns, photo funnies and all the stuff I used to think of as filler.

Thanks for your patience and understanding in these formative days. In the meantime, bookmark this space, take your iodide pills and for Godzilla's sake, don't build any nuclear power plants on active fault-lines!



  1. Hey M, glad you're doing this again. Great way to build up idea and writing for its own sake. Good stuff.
    I've got a quote for you:
    "Get the fuck out of my office, you goddamn imbecile!"

  2. What he said. And more! If you'd like any guest posts, I've got tons of apolitical stuff on media effects. The big question these days is "What is media?" You mention that support from onliners has played a huge role in your life -- is that mediated communication or interpersonal communication? Who knows? The fact is our media environments are far richer than they've ever been at any point in history and it's likely that only retrospect will tell us what the effects are.

  3. BTW -- my favorite joke EVER -- brought to us by the Daily Dirt:

    The Lord of the manor had a butler named Wibble. One day he
    called Wibble and said, "What about running my bath, Wibble?"

    "Certainly, Sir," replied Wibble. "Will there be anything
    else my lord?"

    "Yes, Wibble, what about my dressing gown."

    "Certainly, Sir. Will there be anything else my lord?"

    "Yes, Wibble, what about my carpet slippers."

    "Certainly, Sir, will there be anything else my lord?"

    "No, Wibble. If I require anything else I shall call you."

    With that, the old lord lowered himself into the water and
    let go a long, loud fart. Five minutes later, Wibble returned
    with a hot water bottle on a silver tray.

    "Here you are, my lord, your hot water bottle."

    "I never asked for that," said his lordship.

    Wibble replied, "But you did, my lord. As you lowered yourself
    into the bath, I distinctly heard you say,

  4. Frankly, this is extremely good news to me since you're one of very few people that make any fucking sense through the whole Bush debacle.

    And now that everything is EVEN MORE FUCKED UP, it's good to know my Ol' Pal Jerky will be commenting on it again.


  5. Good to see you back Jerky, you were one of the first great online voices. One day we'll look back and say we knew him before he got big.

  6. I know it started a day or three back, but I'll just think of it as a really kewl birthday present.
    Thank you.

    Happy St Paddy's Day all.

  7. Happy Birthday, Gild! And Happy Saint Pat's Day everybody! Thanks for showing up to my little virtual party, here. More stuff coming soon, I promise! - YOPJ

  8. In the days od Bush you were the best alternative voice out there jerky ol pal . And if you ever get stuck a reprint of your history of everything series ,,,,,well lets just say it should be required reading in every primary school , best,most informatative,readable world history ever. I could never find it in the old dirt file.
    if ever you want a place to relax in Western Australia you can stay at our house,,free...just bring a copy to leave in the dunny!

  9. Glad you're back Jerks. No more fucking off now (Off is tired), let 'er rip.

  10. This morning I told my girl: "I'm happy today, you remember that Daily Dirt thing I told you about some times? The author is not dead, I found him again in the Internet. Let's celebrate".
    It's true, I read your shit a lot when I was younger and I think you were a good influence on me, not only for the jokes and the porn.
    I'm glad to read you again.

    By the way, the template of this blog sucks :P