Friday, March 24, 2017


LOOK at this fucking piece of shit.
  • James Jackson, a White Supremacist military vet who traveled from Maryland to New York City specifically in search of a Black man to murder in public with his super-keen medieval sword, found a victim in Tim Caughman, 66, whom he ran through before running off, then turning himself in at a NYPD substation the next day. But we all know who the real victims are: other White Supremacists!
  • Speaking of White Supremacists, the greasiest member of the Trumpspawn Brood, Donald Trump Junior--who serves as a living reminder that yes, children can be conceived via anal sex--lived down to the family reputation yesterday by using Twitter to launch a lazy, hacky, politically tone-deaf attack on London mayor Sidiq Khan in the wake of his city's vehicular homicide and knife terror attack. Basically, Junior took Khan's (100% valid) comment about the inevitability of such attacks taking place in big international cities entirely out of context. The mayor's refusal to engage with the Chinless Wonder Trump was pretty much the only acceptable course of action. The perpetrator, Khalid Masood, a British-born man of Asian ancestry who has been on the authorities' radar for the better part of a decade, was killed during the attack. 
  • The current (but not for long) Chairman of the Senate Intelligence Committee, Devin Nunes (R-Idiot) spent all day apologizing to his Democratic colleagues about his multiple, almost unbelievable "lapses in judgement" both in relation to his handling of information gleaned during the ongoing Senate probe into the Trump administration's ties to the Kremlin (and other organized crime organizations), as well as his unprecedented decision to personally "debrief" Trump, on what he'd learned during closed door sessions, and... well, let's just say that it's going to take an awful lot of fancy footwork by an awful lot of very skilled dancers to keep an Special Prosecutor from being assigned to take over from the obviously--now irreversibly--compromised Senate cabal currently handling things. Hey, wait a minute... does his blazing incompetence technically mean he's one of the good guys?! 
  • Speaking on paradoxes, allow yer old pal Jerky to speculate about Trump issuing ultimatums and forcing Republican House members into a Friday rush vote on his and Paul Ryan's ruinous "replacement" for Obamacare--despite the Koch bros. meddling and the "Freedom Caucus" spanners in the works--and his "threat" that they may otherwise be "stuck with Obamacare"... That, my friends, is precisely what he wants to see happen. Why? Because he knows that if AHCA passes and replaces Obamacare, it would spell disaster for a great many Republicans at the ballot box in 2018. The millions who will lose their coverage if it passes? Trump could not give less of a fuck about them. But if the bill fails to get enough votes, that means Trump gets to go on doing what he most loves to do: whine about Obama, and flop around shrieking like a rapidly deflating orange balloon. Can't you just hear him now, ranting about being betrayed by "career politicians"? Yeah... ACHC failing is win-win, as far as Trump is concerned. 
  • Hey! Have you heard about the incredibly convoluted back-story that grows more bone-chilling the more you find out about it, but which can essentially be boiled down to: "Nikolai Gorokhov, a key witness in the United States vs Prevezon Russian organized crime probe being conducted by US Attorney General Preet Bharara (up until the day Trump fired him) was thrown from a 4th floor window in Moscow the day before he was scheduled to testify before a Moscow appeals court about the Russian prison murder--and subsequent posthumous prosecution for tax evasion!--of former associate Sergei Magnitsky, barely surviving and currently clinging to life"? You haven't? Well... lucky you.
  • Remember early last week, when Rachel Maddow, MSNBC's tomboyish anchor-lesbian with a voice that sounds like she had a yo-yo surgically attached to her uvula, reported that she'd come into possession of a partial tax return from one year out of Trump's many years of unreleased tax returns? Remember how that two page document--cherry picked and leaked by Trump, himself, most likely--proved to be relatively innocuous and somewhat routine? Remember how liberals and the left ripped out their hipster beards in furious frustration, while all the conservatives and right-wingers came together in a seemingly synchronized orgy of idiotic back-slapping celebration? “HAHA! TRUMP WINS AGAIN! WE WIN! WE WIN!!!” Remember that shit? If there exists a method to quantify precisely how stupid each and every step of that story's sprint across the national news cycle was, yer old pal Jerky doesn't know about it.
  • Speaking of Maddow (whom I have grown to admire, believe it or not), she's been doing some of the best work of any television outlet on sinking her teeth into the greasy meat of the Trump/Russia connections. Her latest find, exposing a genuine Russian "Fake News" social-media polluting "bot" operation disguised as a pro-Bernie Sanders account and being run from the dystopian failed state of Albania--and thereby safely beyond the reach of American and most international legal or civil enforcement institutions--has been eye-opening, and has produced tangible, real world, positive results. So, HUZZAH!
1. Last DDD ExecSum, I was nattering on about helping you guys find quality webcomics to follow before wussing out and sub-contracting the job to another blogger, who gave his readers a handful of quality suggestions among the usual suspects. Of course, the very next day, I come across Dundas and Dragons, a Toronto-centric webcomic that turns into something unexpected before you can even contemplate the possibility that you might get bored with it. Trust me on this one... it's a keeper!

2. Man, I hate when this shit happens. On March 10, I wrote about how Trump was "trying to mainstream the long-standing Far Right notion that a significant number of anti-Semitic attacks are self-inflicted false flags." This was in relation to the massive increase in such incidents that has taken place since just prior to Trump's electoral college "victory" in November, one part of which was a seemingly coordinated series of bomb threats called into various Jewish schools, community centers, and synagogues. Today, we learned that a teen-aged Jewish "hacker" in Israel has been arrested on suspicion of being behind a majority of those threats, which, again, while widely reported on, only make up a small part of the overall increase in anti-Semitic incidents. So unless someone has figured out how to desecrate graveyards over the Internet... it should be irrelevant. But, of course, it won't be. Because it looks bad. It looks really bad. And you know who knows that better than most, and who are probably the most outraged over this idiot's incredibly stupid shenanigans? Jews.

3. Dear God is this classic Bill Moyers Journal edition from the Dubya years, titled "Buying the War", which explores the media's role in helping the Bush administration sell the American people on the idea of invading Iraq (and how things didn't get any better in the four years intervening) ever so goddamn depressing. Read more about the episode before watching, but please do watch. It's a vital lesson in recent history from a true and trustworthy master of the television journalism medium.


On camera, I once said This pizza looks like a manhole cover in Flavortown. Willy Wonka had a chocolate stream, you know? So it's taking these iconic food items, these iconic food moments, and giving them a home. They all live in Flavortown. It's like one of those things in The Matrix: You can only get down with Flavortown if you believe in Flavortown. I have people walk up to me and say Hey, I'm a citizen of Flavortown. I have people who want to pledge to be a city council member of Flavortown, or the mechanic. It doesn't stop. What would be the airline of Flavortown? Sausage Airlines? It just doesn't stop. I just said it, and then people heard it. Of course, there's no Flavortown... unless you believe in it.

- If Sammy Hagar fucked a Troll Doll, the offspring would be something not unlike FlavorTown Dictator-for-Life Guy Fieri.


Man, I gotta finish some of the long-form essays I've been working on and adding to over the past five months. At this rate, they'll never get published. One of them was sparked by PizzaGate for fuck's sake! I mean, it's evolved a lot since then, and the concepts I am exploring are still important and poorly covered... but shit man, it's starting to grow potato fingers.

1 comment:

  1. This needs to happen. It needs to happen now. Think about it, won't you?